Monday, December 05, 2011

While buying food for my dog...

I was in the check-out line at the health food store buying a bag of organic dog 

food for my dog when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I 

be buying dog food, right? So on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog. 

I said that I was starting the Wild Dog Food Diet again, and that I probably   

shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time. I said that I'd lost 35 pounds 

the last time - before I awakened in intensive care, with tubes coming out of most 

of my orifices and IVs in both arms. 

I told her that it was essentially the Perfect Diet and all you do is load your pockets 

with Organic Wild Dog Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel 

hungry. The food is organic and nutritionally complete so it works well and I was 

going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was 

now enthralled with my story.) 

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned 

me. I told her no. What happened was that I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's 

butt and was hit by a car. 

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so 

hard. Better watch what you ask me and be prepared for my answer.

PS. In the interest of full disclosure: Now that you've read all this way I have to confess, I copied this story from a friend's facebook status and she copied it from someone else. I hope you laughed as hard as I did - we can all use a giggle at this time of year... and any time of year.

PSS. The photos are of my real dog and she really does eat organic food that I buy at the health food store. 

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