Saturday, June 12, 2010

Back to my list-making...

First Jen Lemen did it - she made up some great list topics and filled them in.
Then Jena Strong did it.
Now it's my turn. But I'm adding a few categories of my own.

Things I'm learning:
* Italian
* patience
* forgiveness - both extending it and receiving it
* how to be married
* how to parent teenagers
* how to say "no more"
* how to say "bring it on"
* how to deal with bullies and bossiness

Things I want to unlearn:
* everything I know about medication and doctors' offices and emergency rooms
* most of what I know about church and its useless, meaningless, oppressive traditions
* how messed up the world and all of us, its inhabitants (including myself!), really are
* how to be a full-fledged adult - childhood was so much less stressful
* everything I know about pollution and chemicals and child abuse and modern slave labor and economic imbalance and animal cruelty

Things I'm wishing and praying for:
* peace everywhere: in every broken heart, in every unquiet mind, in every tormented soul, in every family, relationship, home - and beyond
* an end to that ridiculous oil spill
* an end to our deep dependence on that oil and all the things it is used to create
* a way of life that is based on contentment and gratitude, not greed and consumerism
* healing for people I love from cancer, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, glaucoma, depression, heart disease and fear
* for a healthy and energetic pregnancy for a dear friend in Spain
* good health, healthy food, and life-sustaining work for all who are in need
* an end to tornadoes, hurricanes, earthquakes, floods, drought, and war
* the return of passion, deep, pulse-quickening passion

Things that are making me happy:
* an excellent mug of morning coffee
* my bed
* the ceiling fan above my bed
* all the rain we've had lately
* great times with my husband and children
* having a buddy to go see Hindi movies with
* subtitles at Hindi movies (I wish I understood Hindi)
* the many good books I'm reading at the moment, especially Dreaming in Hindi
* summer fruit and vegetables, fresh and tasty
* starting a summer journal
* unexpected reconnections with friends and family after not only brief misunderstandings
but also after way too much time of being disconnected

Things that are getting on my nerves:
* politics and political shenanigans
* recurring nightmares, fears, and worries
* greed and injustice
* my own apathy and unwillingness to take risks
* people who are quick to criticize but incapable of taking criticism
* the escalating cost of living

Things that are soothing my nerves:
* solitude, solitude, solitude
* journaling, especially when I use big, fat Sharpies and Copic and Prismacolor markers on thick watercolor paper
* holding hands
* going to the gym and getting my sweat on
* going out for walks in the morning, alone
* friends who listen to my tales of woe and give me sound advise
* being myself, fully, truly, fearfully, fearlessly, unapologetically myself
* staying away from situations and people that get on my nerves
* dreaming in Spanish, Italian, and sometimes in Hindi too

Things I don't know yet (except, of course, when I do)
* how to let go of stuff (physical stuff, emotional stuff, relational stuff, religious stuff) that needs to go
* that it's time to stop complaining about everything I complain about and do something about it
* how and when to walk away, no regrets, no explanations, just walk away
* how excellent and right and satisfying it is to tell the truth, even when it hurts the person I must speak it to
* that most of the time the one person in my life who needs to hear the truth the most is the woman in the mirror
* the importance of not relying on anyone else to take care of me and meet my needs
* the best ways to take care of myself
* how to ask for help when I need it
* how important my own dreams and hopes are and that it's okay to dedicate myself and my time to make them come true
* how to ask for my bedroom and my solo time and my privacy back
* that faith and prayer and devotion and dedication and commitment matter, big time
* that all is well and that all shall be well

Things I'm looking forward to:
* summer tennis tournaments
* the freedom to set my own schedule
* having a few days alone right here at home
* a break from translating/interpreting
* glasses of cold sangria on hot summer nights
* teaching a class on solitude in the fall
* getting a new computer sometime soon (This one, God bless it, is nearly 7 years old. What is that in computer years? 150??? It has never had a debilitating virus, nor has it ever crashed, mind you, but tragedy cannot be far away --> of that, I am certain.)
* speaking to a group of South Carolina's finest social workers at the end of July - telling my family's story
* every good and perfect gift that is yet to come from the hand of The One who Loves me most
* life itself - and whatever will follow this life too

3 comments:

michi herself said...

It's been a while since I visited your blog. I so wish you could be a part of my discussions with another woman here in San Antonio about religion. We question - ask the hard questions - we explore, we support, we read.

I also enjoy foreign films and have seen quite a few lately from Film Movement - most have been excellent.

Thanks for sharing!

Semi-A said...

I hope and look forward to sharing a hot night next summer jabbering with you about everything, or maybe just a few things, cold glass of Sangria in hand while we're on your porch.

Ti amo.

Lisa said...

What a great list!!!

Well said :-)